I’m a Softie Now That I’m a Mom

I feel like I’ve been a little bit of an emotional wreck these past few days. I had no idea becoming a mom would cause me to turn into a softie. I have too much German in my blood to be emotional–I must be stoic all the time.

We’re taking a break from the normal running posts, although I do have a bit of exciting news to share on the running front at the end of this post. Instead we’re going to talk about baby things. I hope you don’t mind seeing a picture of this cutie. (Even the pediatrician commented that he’s going to be a funny kid.)

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The first time I cried in the past couple of days was when I someone posted a video of a girl being rescued from rubble. In the video, you can’t even see the baby, but several men start digging and eventually reveal a tiny baby buried alive! Initially I thought it was footage from the Napal earthquake, but when I showed it to Craig he pointed out that they were speaking Arabic and most likely not a video from the earthquake just a few days ago. I then found the video on YouTube.

Doesn’t matter when or where it took place, I had tears in my eyes watching this baby being uncovered. Seriously, how could this child so young and helpless survive under all that rubble buried alive and able to breathe! Definitely miracle from God! All I could think of was what if that baby was Cullen. Right after I watched the video I had to go and hold Cullen, give him lots of kisses, and tell him I loved him.

Then another friend today shared these photos of a baby girl who was pulled from the rubble in the Napal earthquake.

At least 22 hours after the earthquake struck Nepal, a miracle emerged from the rubble. CNN has obtained these powerful images showing a four-month-old boy being rescued.

The third time my heart sank for a baby was when we were at the dog park last night. There was a women pushing a stroller with a very small baby in it–probably only a month old. The baby was in a flimsy umbrella stroller and not in a carseat attached to the stroller like so many newborns are in these days. The woman was also walking two dogs who were both on a leash. The one dog was particularly unruly, pulling on the leash, barking, and jumping up and a down. I saw the whole thing happen in slow motion and could see the outcome before it even happened. The one wild dog started pulling on his leash which caused his owner to pull back. The dog then ran behind her, spinning her around, and in the process the woman accidentally pulled the stroller with her, causing the stroller to tip over and the baby to hit the ground. My heart immediately sank for the baby. The woman quickly picked up the stroller and took the baby out to comfort him. He was, of course, crying hysterically, and I felt so bad for him. Craig offered to walk her overly active dog back to her car, which I was so grateful he did.

And on top of these stories, I have been trying to teach Cullen to fall asleep on his own, which means he has been fussing and crying for quite some time each night as he learns to fall asleep on his own. I feel so bad letting him cry it out, but I want him to learn to be able to fall asleep on his own–especially when he wakes up in the middle of the night and he isn’t actually hungry. (Side note: I have been comforting him every 5 – 10 minutes, but it is still hard.)

And now onto my running news. . . .I have hired my coach, Nichole, back! I hemmed and hawed about this for quite some time. Ultimately Craig said I should go for it, and I have learned it is best to listen to him on things like this. I contemplated continuing to train on my own, pointing out that I had almost PRed last weekend. He replied, “Yeah, you almost PRed, but you didn’t.” He knows I would be a lot faster with someone elses expertise. I’ve been doing the same type of workouts for several years now, so it is time to change things up.

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Hi, I'm Michelle

I love running around the lakes of Minnesota, running after my two boys, and racing anything from the 5K to the marathon. I have been blogging here since 2010 when I ran my first marathon. I finally secured my sub-3 hour marathon after trying for 8 years.

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9 Comments

  1. 4.30.15
    Renee said:

    Oh!! I have to stay away from those kind of things, they leave me in hysterics!! Having kids definitely turns your insides to mush!!

    • 5.6.15
      Michelle said:

      I can’t believe the high highs and low lows you have as a parent!

  2. 4.30.15
    alicia said:

    yay for a coach! I know how much it has helped me!

    • 5.6.15
      Michelle said:

      No matter where you are in the pack, it is always nice to have someone else to bounce questions/concerns/ideas off of. 🙂

  3. 4.30.15
    Nichole Porath said:

    I am so happy to have you back and can’t wait to chase new things! Also, you already know, but Cullen is such a nut!

    • 5.6.15
      Michelle said:

      We need to get Cullen and Greta together for a play date!

  4. 5.3.15

    I relate to this post so much. I am of German descent (I even teach German here in NJ) and am normally very stoic and reserved. I was never a baby person until my son was born last August, and now my heart breaks every time I think of another baby in any kind of pain or distress. I didn’t exactly cry when I saw the photos of the baby being rescued in Nepal, but it had such an unexpected effect on me that I didn’t see coming. My son still doesn’t sleep well through the night and his crying breaks my heart every time.

    Also, congrats on running so well post part and hiring back your running coach. Best of luck to you in future races!

    • 5.6.15
      Michelle said:

      The video is what really got me. My husband doesn’t seem to be as affected by his cries–at least not yet.